Burning questions. Fervent opinions. A lively exchange of ideas.

And we haven’t even left the dining hall.

Napkin notes have been a Bennington dining hall tradition since…well, who knows when. Anyone with a question, suggestion, or comment about the food can grab a napkin, scrawl out their thoughts, and tack it up on the big bulletin board. The dining hall staff tapes their responses to the napkins for public viewing. It’s probably safe to say the notes reveal as much about the Bennington community as they do about the food.

Want to eavesdrop on the conversation? Here we’ve plucked a few recent notes and responses for you to savor. Enjoy...

Napkin: sprinkles...like a ticker tape parade for your mouth
Dining Hall Response: Sounds like you’re eating too many.

Napkin: It took me 2 1/2 half years to discover… the raspberry preserves are divine! What are they? (Where do they come from?)
Dining Hall Response: Do we have to have “the birds and the bees” talk?

Napkin: The black bean burgers are broken! (This means they rock.) Yummy, let’s have more often, please?
Dining Hall Response: Thanks for the definition! My dinosaur 21st century dictionary is still at the printers. The black bean burgers show up twice in the five-week-cycle menu—once at lunch and once at dinner.

Napkin: Can we have fish sticks?
Dining Hall Response: Maybe—if Lynn and Stephanie agree to dress up like 1950s school lunch ladies. Grammar School theme night?

Napkin: Dear dining hall, I was always afraid of kale, but a few weeks ago I tried it and now I like it so much. Wow, a purple vegetable! Thank you!
Dining Hall Response: S’cuse me while I kiss the sky.... Oh, that’s purple haze.

Napkin: Please bring back the Cracklin’ Oat Bran soon or I surely shall cry.
Dining Hall Response: Hopefully it will be on tomorrow’s delivery truck. If it doesn’t show up, I’ll tape a tissue to your note.

Napkin: Quiche was amazing! Thank God.
Dining Hall Response: “You’re welcome!’ —God

Napkin: Go Yankees!
Dining Hall Response: Yeah, yeah, yeah! You’ll be changing your tune Wednesday at lunch as you’re munching on your Fenway Franks and Pedro Pups.

Napkin: Can we have bananas available more often? It would really make my cereal at lunch amazing (it’s my breakfast). Thanks a lot!
Dining Hall Response: Bananas should be available at every meal! The offending staff members will be shot on Friday—need a job? Actually, we’ve been getting bananas that have been too green to put out.

Napkin: I LOVE PEAS!
Dining Hall Response: Shhh... don’t shout! I love peas and quiet!

Napkin: What?!? Who won yesterday? Oh yeah! The Yankees won! Why am I not surprised? Because they are the bomb! Maybe we should have some soup!
Dining Hall Response: The Sox are still in it! It’s still Fenway Franks, Pedro Pups and Boston Baked Beans!

Napkin: To the management staff of the Bennington College dining hall: As a frequent patron of your dining establishment we feel greatly misinformed about the lack of descriptive information about the bean of the day. My colleagues and I have pondered this dilemma and we feel satisfied we have found a solution. I realize this may seem radical, it might be unorthodox, but it must be done. If you could find it in your hearts to give the beans a name, we would appreciate it and so would they. —Beans
Dining Hall Response: Over the long weekend we will undergo bean sensitivity training.

Napkin: The chicken last night was awesome! We should have chicken all the time.
Dining Hall Response: Thank you! I’ll remind you of this a few weeks from now when you’re writing “For the love of God, no more chicken!!”

Napkin: Perhaps next time you could put onions in the brownies or refried beans in the grilled cheese, or vinegar on the carrots or an exotic brand of chocolate into the chicken patties. My sarcasm is intended only to point out that too often the good can be spoiled by the bad.
Dining Hall Response: Sarcasm? Those are all great ideas! Next menu!

Napkin: [In reference to the once-a-term “Fun Food Night”] Last night popcorn chicken made a triumphant and delicious return. Please bring it back more often! The fried dough, cotton candy, snow cones, and ice cream stuff were awesome! Thank you so much!
Dining Hall Response: You’re welcome! And since you asked so nicely, sure, we’ll run popcorn chicken more often.

Napkin: Dear dining hall staff, especially the chef, I said rude things about your dinner tonight and I’m sorry.
Dining Hall Response: “Go my child and sin no more!”—Paul

Napkin: Rocky horror loves the dining hall!
Dining Hall Response: Yeah, we’re both cult classics.

Napkin: Dear dining hall, Today’s “banana bars” made me happier than I have been in weeks. My mom keeps forgetting to send me banana bread, but now I know the kitchen staff really loves me.
Dining Hall Response: Was there ever any doubt?

More:

• Food at Bennington
• Campus community
• This week's dining hall menu
• The Dining Hall

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